Any marriage where the bride is allowed to speak and wear clothes is doomed to failure.
= Quark (Star Trek: DS9)

* Worf: "Before the wedding we must endure 5 tests. Blood, pain, sacrifice, suffering and finally, death." "Sounds like marriage all right."
= Star Trek DS9 (You are cordially invited...)

* Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
= Oscar Wilde

* How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.
= Oscar Wilde

* The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.
= Oscar Wilde

* The proper basis for a marriage is mutual misunderstanding.
= Oscar Wilde

* No one can consider themselves truly married until they understand every word their spouse is not saying.
= Lord Mancroft

* A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.
= H. L. Mencken

* Who ever strikes at marriage either by word or act undermines the foundation of all moral society.
= Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

* So heavy is the bond of marriage that it takes two, and sometimes three to bear it.
= Alexander Dumas, found on a Baci wrapper.

* Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house.
= Louis Grizzard Quoted in Readers Digest

* Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
= Mae West

* A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he is finished.
= Zsa Zsa gabor

* In married life, a little hypocricy has always greased the works.
= Swami Raj

* Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner.
= Charles Caleb Colton

* No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes that she were not.
= H L Mencken

* Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
= Oscar Wilder